Strange Cats

So, as I mentioned in my first post and my bio, I have cats. Strange cats.

Meet Mutant Cat 1

And Mutant Cat 2.0

My cats are both Cornish Rex; a breed that originated in Cornwall, England in the 1950s and is known for its ultra-soft, curly down coat, and…unique appearance.  Yes, they look a bit naked sometimes, and yes, when they sit in the window just right, you can see the sun through their ears AND the skin between the bones in their lower legs. And yes, while I think they are absolutely lovely (evocative of Egyptian statues, even), I fully understand that cats who look more than a little bit like bug-eyed, bat-eared aliens are not to everyone’s taste. (Don’t listen to them babies; you’re beautiful)

Now, although we find their earnest, goofy faces and tip-toe gait charming, we chose our Cornies not for their appearance but for their personalities. Affectionate, cuddly, and family-oriented do not even begin to describe our boys. I think their breeder said it best when she informed us that “These cats don’t just want to be under the covers with you, they want to be in your pajamas with you.”  She was right. I spend a fair deal of time with a cat up my sweater (or down my overalls) and choose my hoodies based on cat-accommodation potential.

What our breeder failed to tell us was that in addition to being cuddly and playful, Cornish Rex cats are crazy. Insane, bonkers, wonder-if-they’ve-been-possessed level crazy. Imagine a Siamese. Its a breed known for being curious, intelligent, and mischievous when bored, right? We should know, we’ve had two. Now give that Siamese twenty cans of Mountain Dew…and some coffee…and methamphetamine, and you might….might…get a picture of a Cornish Rex cat in the grip of the 10pm crazies. I count myself lucky that they sleep pretty much twenty hours a day.

So, without further ado, I give you my ever-evolving list of “Strange things I’ve had to say to my cats”

• Don’t lick the cheese-grater
• Don’t lick the knife
• That’s my avocado
• No, you can’t have my popcorn
• NO! My popcorn!
• Get out of (insert name here)’s shirt
• Maybe ask (insert name here) if she minds you crawling up her skirt?
• Why did you carry the drain-plug down the stairs?
• Where is my bookmark? What did you do with my bookmark?
• The GM’s screen is not your sworn enemy; leave it alone!
• Don’t eat the curtain/wooden spoon/stuffed animal/tooth pick/blanket!
• Did you eat my running sock?
• Get off the toaster!
• Get out of the frying pan!
• Aug! Did you sit in the curry?